How to Overcome Depression and Never Relapse Again
It is possible to overcome depression and never relapse again! YOU can do this…because MANY others have done it too! In this episode of The Overcome Depression Podcast, Jennifer Stirling-Campbell explores the science of commitment and the power that comes when we make a true, 100% decision. An unwavering decision can help anyone quit an addiction–any addiction–and never go back. After giving several personal examples, Jennifer argues that leaving room for exceptions can lead to major setbacks, and that only full commitment can result in lasting and permanent change. Additionally, she encourages listeners to visualize their future, create the perfect vision board, and make conscious choices that align with their goals.
Create a Vision Board So You Can Quit an Addiction and Never Go Back
A vision board is a beautiful way to support yourself (and your inner artist) as you quit an addiction and move forward. A vision board is, quite literally, a photographic demonstration of who your new-self is. The more you see it and focus on it daily, the better! Here are some of my suggestions for a vision board:
- When you look at your vision board, do so with the mindset that THIS IS YOU, AND IT IS YOU RIGHT NOW! This isn’t your vision board of your “future self.” While you might not have or be all of the things on the board yet, you’re committed to it. It’s a done deal. And therefore, everything on the board is already yours, even if it hasn’t come into your time and space quite yet.
- Put the vision board somewhere where you will see it OFTEN. Ideally, you need to be facing this board several times a day and spending at least 20 seconds focussed on it each time.
- Your vision board will best serve you at eye-level.
- Fill the board with color. Write on it. Find colorful images online, create your own artwork, or use AI or Canva.com to create images that fill you with hope, love and joy. Make sure that ALL three of these are present in your work!
- Focus on six key areas you want to develop and illustrate (in pictures) WHAT you want your life to look like as you are developing them:
- SPIRITUAL health
- PHYSICAL health
- INTELLECTUAL health
- SOCIAL health (Relationships/Career/Home Life)
- NEW SKILLS, TALENTS, or HOBBIES you learn
- PROPERTY you own
100% is Easier Than 99%
Is 100% easier than 99%? For real? Um…. Why would 100% be easier than 99%?
It may sound counterintuitive. But think of it this way….
A recovering addict is trying to stay away from her [drug of choice]. She’s been doing really well. In fact, she hasn’t touched drugs since she moved away from Wisconsin, and that was over six months ago. But then she learns that her mother passed away. A week later, she has a falling-out with one of her best friends. And then-as if matters couldn’t get any worse-there are layoffs going on at work. Minutes after her manager calls her into his office, she’s out of a job.
“This is just too much. I need this,” she justifies. “Just one fix; just one. I need something to help me get through this, and then I’ll stop. I swear I’ll stop. Just this once…I deserve this. Then I’ll never do it again.”
Unfortunately…the lies we tell ourselves can be our worst enemy. It’s rarely (if ever) “just once.”
When we leave the door of addiction open-even just 1% open-we inevitably fall to that 1% every time life gets unbearably hard. And at some point…it always does.
On the other hand….
When we decide 100% that we are no longer willing to engage in an addictive behavior ever again, the universe collaborates with our will. By an absolute and miraculous power that I have yet to understand, we begin to transform. Consequently, our world simultaneously begins to transform around us.
Then…when life gets unbearably hard…we no longer act as we once did. Why? Because we decided long before the temptation ever occurred that the answer was NO. And will always be NO. As a result, any former temptation requires ZERO will power from us to resist, because there is literally no fight to be had. The battle has already been won. The answer is and always will be irrevocably and eternally: “NO.”
I have personally never struggled with drugs or alcohol for this reason. For me, that was always an easy, “HECK NO. NOT INTERESTED. NEVER FOREVER.”
As for the depression I struggled with…that was different. The chemicals that pulsed through my body when I was angry was addicting too, and I allowed it to dominate my life for YEARS. To top it off, I was a massive sugar addict. And I struggled with these addictions for nearly 30 years before I finally made the decision that I was going to heal–no iffs, ands or butts! And when I did, everything began to change.
I want you to know that overcoming depression is possible for you! Thank you for joining me on your incredible journey!
Want to Heal Faster?? Get the Overcome Depression Workbook!
Get The Overcome Depression Workbook for each #Chapter of the Overcome Depression Podcast and maximize your healing power!
Full Transcript: Episode 20: How to Quit an Addiction and Never Go Back
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (00:00)
What if I told you that 100% effort is a lot easier than 99% effort?
As I’m recording this podcast now, I am completing the fifth video podcast of the day, and I am exhausted. I try to do a bunch of them all at once. It saves time, saves energy, and I try to sit down and do them about every other week.
I’m making a lot of personal sacrifices to do these recordings. And so if you enjoy and feel like you are benefiting from these recordings and this podcast, these videos, and the workbook, if you could please leave me a five-star review.
Ratings do help; thank you so much.
So why would 99% effort be harder than 100% effort? Benjamin Hardy introduced this idea to me. I love Benjamin Hardy.
And the way that he described it was that basically when we give ourselves that 1%; that 1% of the time that we make an exception or an excuse, and we talked about excuses in one of these other recent videos and how very unhelpful they are. it opens up a way for us to take major setbacks when we could be making so much progress. For example, A drug addict or someone who’s struggling they may be making massive progress.
And they haven’t indulged in a really long time. And suddenly they have a death in the family or a really, really hard day or they lose their job and they make the decision subconsciously or consciously that I really need this right now. I really need this right now. I’m just going to do it once and then I will never do it again. And we all know what happens when that happens. It has a tendency to pull us back right into where we were before and be kicking ourselves afterwards. ‘Why did we do that?’
When we make a 100% commitment to abstain from a previous behavior, and that’s not always 100% possible wherever we’re at; we have to decide when we’re ready to decide. And I talked a lot about that in introduction video number five, if you want to review that. But the most important decision we will ever make is the decision to decide.
It cuts off all other options and propels us in a new direction. It’s miraculous. And when I do it and when I witnessed other people do it, it really does change your life. My life has been changed by decisions. Have I always been ready to make a decision? No.
But when you are ready to make a decision, make it 100%. Not almost or maybe. Really commit to that 100%. “This is what I used to do, now I do this. That is not me anymore.”
Benjamin Hardy gave an example through one of his clients who was struggling with his weight. He wanted to be a fit, fabulous, healthy human specimen. A lot of the people in his family struggled with weight as well. And as he was talking to this client of his, he asked him what kind of goal he wanted to make for himself. And he decided that he was going to remove sugar from his diet. And then Benjamin asked his client, “Well, how long do you want to do that?”
And he said, “I think I could do it for three months.” And Benjamin asked him then, “Well what about after that three months? Let’s say you lose so many pounds and then after that three months, then what?” And his client realized that this could not be a three month decision. It would essentially just pull him right back into his previous lifestyle and his previous weight if he didn’t make this a lifetime commitment. And so that’s what he decided to do.
He made that part of his new identity. ‘I don’t do that anymore. Now I eat these things.’ Now that’s not always an easy place to get to. But it is my goal as we get you through this program that slowly and surely you will get to a point where you will be able to make some of these decisions. First small ones and then these bigger ones. We can make the small ones now. That’s okay. But let’s make the whatever decisions you make, whether it’s to eat a banana every day. It could be that simple, but 100% commitment to that, eating a banana every day.
When I finally decided that I was going to defeat and overcome depression, I did not know how that was going to happen. I simply told God, or in your case, if you don’t believe in God, the universe, that I was done being depressed, that I knew there was an answer, that I didn’t know it, but that He was gonna show it to me and there were no ifs, ands, or buts about it. And I knew in my heart that that was going to happen. I didn’t know how.
But that was a decision I made. “This is happening.”
And I simply let God and the universe know, that I was ready and that I was ready now. Now, did I stop taking my medication that day? No, I had to wait for those solutions to come to me, but it didn’t take very long. We’re talking about a month, maybe two, that things started rolling, started coming my way, things I’d never thought of before.
And I talk about this a lot in my introduction videos of my story, how I came to this decision and then this realization in this enlightenment that I wanted to share with the world what I know now that anyone I believe with all my heart that anyone can heal.
And I do want to emphasize again, please work with your medical professional as you are healing from depression. Don’t just stop taking meds. You do need to work with a therapist or medical professional so that you can do this safely.
One of my favorite quotes is by Michael Jordan. He said that, “Once I make a decision, I never think about it again.” And that is a powerful statement and a powerful truth because the truth Will power does not work. Eventually we run out of will power. Eventually we will give into the thing that is that 1% pulling us away because we haven’t quite decided yet or we’re not quite ready to let it go.
Believe it or not, depression, anxiety…these are chemical addictions that our body produces. Our body produces these chemicals that we become accustomed to and then it continues to do it again because that becomes our normal. And throughout this program, I teach you tools that will help navigate that and get you out of that place.
I want to tell one more story as it pertains to my grandmother. She was an amazing woman, one of the most forgiving people I have ever met. So kind, such a good heart. She struggled with addiction most of her life or most of her life.
She would drink at night and would get very irritable with my grandfather who essentially was very passive and put up with it for many many years but got to the point where he decided he just couldn’t take it anymore and he left.
It still makes me emotional to think about the strength that this woman had, but that it took her losing the man she loved to make the decision. Because that day, the day he left her, was the day she put away the alcohol and never picked it up again.
I think it’s human nature to wait until it’s almost too late to change, until we’re faced with an imminent devastation that we’re trying to avoid, whether it’s health related, relationship related, and so forth….but sometimes it’s those pivotal moments that change us. You may not be there yet. You may have already been there. You may be there now.
I want you to consider now some of the behaviors you’re doing right now. Take an inventory of your relationships, your life habits, and so forth from a place of compassion, please. And then look 10 years into the future. Ask yourself, if I keep doing what I’m doing in this area, how will my life and relationships look in 10 years? And then ask yourself, if I replace this behavior or habit with, and then fill in the blank, new habit.
New reaction, new response, new behavior. How will my life and relationships look in 10 years? It might be also a good idea for you to visualize these, this future you want in the form of a vision board. You can either find copyright-free images online print them off at your local Walgreens or Shutterfly, or find pictures in magazines or other colorful places that you can make into a poster and really help you identify with and feel the hope of this future.
This is a picture of my vision board. I’ve had some of these things on here for a long time, others I’ve added, and then just some things that make me happy and bring me joy.
Lastly, I want to leave you with a quote by my good friend Henry Amar. And I believe I’ve quoted this in previous videos, but it’s just that good.
The most important decision you will ever make is the decision to decide.
Thank you so much for spending time with me today. I’m thankful for you. I’m grateful you are here. I’m grateful and thankful that you are healing.
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