Cricket Rules: Why Boundaries Are Important in Relationships
Cricket is all about setting boundaries. Depression healing also begins with boundaries. In this powerful conversation, Jennifer Stirling-Campbell and Lili Stephenson explore how setting healthy boundaries supports personal development, emotional resilience, and stronger relationships. Using the game of cricket as a teaching tool, they reveal how young girls can learn empowerment, agency, and voice. The discussion also dives into societal pressures on women, the struggle to say no, and the role of forgiveness and healing in reclaiming self-worth.
Whether you’re navigating recovery, building self-respect, or guiding others, this episode offers deep insights on how boundaries support depression healing and personal growth.
List to this episode of the Overcome depression Podcast and learn:
- How healthy boundaries support depression healing and long-term emotional well-being
- Why cricket is a powerful metaphor for teaching and understanding personal boundaries
- The role of your personal voice in setting limits and expressing needs clearly
- How to identify and navigate appropriate vs. inappropriate boundaries
- Why forgiveness is essential to personal growth and trauma recovery
- How agency and choice help reclaim power in your relationships and life decisions
- Practical ways to improve communication skills for setting and maintaining boundaries
- What it really takes to heal from trauma and rebuild emotional resilience
- How Empowered Cricket offers a unique, engaging framework for teaching boundaries to youth
Want to Heal Faster?? Get the Overcome Depression Workbook!
Get The Overcome Depression Workbook for each #Chapter of the Overcome Depression Podcast and maximize your healing power!
Full Transcript for Episode 36: Cricket Rules: Why Boundaries Are Important in Relationships
Ann Ferguson (00:00)
A level five is when you do stupid.
We call that in our house, Psycho Winch, and I believe she lives in every woman.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (00:04)
Yeah, Psycho Wench,
Ann Ferguson (00:06)
At a level one, two, and three, we still have cognitive function. Because what’s happening by the time you’re level four, biochemically, that’s when there is a flood of chemicals. They’ve been building, but that’s when the of chemicals hits and your frontal lobe goes offline. Now you’re just sitting in the limbic system,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (00:22)
Yep, doon!
Ann Ferguson (00:24)
in a one, two or three, there is a way to think yourself out of it and be reasonable and all that. But at a level four or five, the only thing you can do is calm the body It’s both the weapon and the gift, right?
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (00:38)
Mm-hmm.
Today we have Anne Ferguson with us. Hello Anne.
Ann Ferguson (00:48)
Hello, it’s so good to be here.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (00:50)
I’m so excited. Will you tell us briefly who you are, what you do?
Ann Ferguson (00:55)
Sure. So I’m Anne Ferguson. I’m a mother of five, a grandmother of five, all granddaughters. I’ve got some sons. I am a professional mentor. a NeuroGraphic specialist, and we’ll talk more about what that means. And honestly, I’m just a servant of God, just doing what he asks me to do. And today was one of those prompting days, because we weren’t going to do this today.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (01:17)
Yeah, right?
Ann Ferguson (01:19)
had the moment and so I follow promptings, that’s who I am.
initial training was mentoring for addiction recovery. used to support both the kids who were in pornography abuse and their mamas who were in mama trauma and then wives who were in betrayal trauma. That’s where my training comes from. Then there were some things that I wanted to add. I created the Igniting Your Belief Program.
And I’m always looking for new things. And then God led me into neurographics. And I go, oh, that all works together really well.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (01:51)
What are neuro graphics.
Ann Ferguson (01:53)
Neurographics is a new method. I’m not going to say of psychology, it’s more mindset work, if you will. However, it was developed by a psychologist from Russia, Pavel Piskolev is his name. In Russia, you have to be a psychiatrist too.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (02:00)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (02:10)
and so they have to have all the neuroscience behind it. So this is a method that’s coming from Russia that they’ve been using over and over and over recently, that as you draw, there’s the graphics part. It actually changed the neural pathways in your brain. That’s the neural part.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (02:26)
Which is so cool. I did this class with you. release? I think I’m actually in that recording, the one that you sell. So I was in that group, but it was fascinating. And I really believe it works because at least for me.
Ann Ferguson (02:29)
Just getting
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (02:39)
put visualization into practice, I feel differences in my body and I can actually measure it in some cases and go, my gosh, like what I actually imagined or saw in my mind’s eye worked. And not everyone has that strength necessarily, but I think most people can draw and look at a drawing in front of them and internalize what that is doing or what could be doing for their brain.
Ann Ferguson (02:59)
Absolutely.
Well, what we know based on neuroscience is the way that the neurons change and shift, that’s called neuroplasticity. When they shift and change, that’s because of repetition and emotion. What the neurographics does is as you’re drawing these neural lines over and over and over again, and you’re adding color and you’re letting emotion come up and process, you’re doing all of that like this. Instead of 10 therapy sessions,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (03:08)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (03:27)
to get that repetition and that emotional stuff that will change your mind the way that you think, the neurographics actually changes it. One of the things I like to say am out in Utah I-15. If I was on the East Coast, it would be I-95. There’s that major thoroughfare that gets all the little towns connected. Some of these places that we
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (03:49)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (03:53)
struggle with whether it be relationships or money or health or whatever, it’s like having to do all the backroads to get to where you’re supposed to be. NeuroGraphic says is it builds the freeway. The only reason why you don’t have it is because you don’t have a neural pathway to get there. This helps with straightening all that and getting those neural pathways created. My company’s name is Belief Matters.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (04:04)
Yeah.
Ann Ferguson (04:18)
And there’s a reason for that because when we have thoughts, the moment we adopt one of them is true, that becomes a belief. The moment that we say that one is the one. And then we have feelings once we have those thoughts, right? And then the feelings lead to the actions and the actions lead to the results. So belief matters. Which side are you going to do? The doubt and fear or the one that says, I’ve got this? And especially with depression, man, that is so hard because emotionally everything in your body
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (04:40)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (04:46)
is just saying, can’t, I can’t, I can’t, right? And grab onto thoughts and allow the thoughts to work, it really helps. So I’ve experienced depression of my life,
I’m always trying to shift and move. I know what diet does to that depression. I know what the sun does to that depression. I know what circumstances and situations do to that depression. Because there’s so many factors, right? the biochemical factor. There is a genetic factor. There is a situational factor. And for me, the sun, I need light.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (05:07)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (05:26)
I have that seasonal affective disorder. We found out biologically that I don’t have a gene that absorbs vitamin D except from sun. That’s why I have seasonal affective disorder. That’s why I go to red light bed every four days during the winter so that I can keep my mood up.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (05:33)
Ooh, interesting.
Yeah, yeah, I try to get outside
within 30 minutes every day. I’m not always successful, but that’s, that can be the thing for a lot of people. this week in particular was quite difficult, had a lot of emotional challenges. And in the past I would have spiraled and spiraled and spiraled. it, I mean, it just didn’t matter what I did. It would just get worse and worse and worse and worse. But finding tools along the way have given me the confidence that, I can figure this out.
Ann Ferguson (05:51)
important.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (06:10)
even though I, and I haven’t probably had this happen 20 years, like legit, sorry, about 15, about 15 years, but my mind was spinning. It was just reeling, spinning, spinning, spinning, spinning. And reminded of, oh yeah, this is what it was like to be depressed every day. It was torture. and I,
Ann Ferguson (06:15)
wow.
Hmm?
every day.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (06:28)
went through a day of this and thought, okay, I’m going to go to sleep. I’m sure by tomorrow it’ll have worked itself out. And I woke up and immediately was spinning again.
Ann Ferguson (06:36)
That’s so frustrating.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (06:37)
and I was like, okay, this is clearly a problem. And I shouted out to God, help me, help me. whatever don’t have time for this right now. I need a quick fix. And what happened was pretty miraculous. As I said this prayer, a water bottle, this one right in front of me here, it’s got stones in the bottom. Well, there were…
Ann Ferguson (06:44)
Right?
Yeah.
Ta-da!
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (07:02)
I saw this bottle and I recognized immediately, this is you as in me, and I saw white stones and I got the message. Those are your Yurum and Thumbum stones. okay. Whatever. And then I saw hand take this bottle and there were little specks in it. Kind of like when you powder product or something in there and you mix it up and it doesn’t completely clean out when you pour it out or even when you wash it a few times, it’s like, you got to get the scrubby brush. Yeah. The little granules. And I could see that, but over and over and over again,
Ann Ferguson (07:07)
No.
Wow.
Yeah.
Right, instead of the granules. Yeah.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (07:29)
I saw hand grab the bottle he would fill it up with soapy water. He do this, shake it up, pour it out, do it over again, over and over and over again. And I saw that image in my mind for good hour. I was just going about my day. didn’t cause me to have to stop and meditate or That image was in my mind as I was going throughout my morning doing my chores.
Ann Ferguson (07:36)
Wow.
Wow.
I’m saying it.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (07:49)
At the end of that hour, the thoughts, the racing, the circulatory over and over and over again, it was gone. And I had that relief. I I’m always figuring out new things. I talk to God regularly.
Ann Ferguson (07:56)
Wow.
Wow.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (08:02)
what I do for this this time, because it’s not always going to be the same thing.
Ann Ferguson (08:06)
Yeah, yeah, I love that. One of the things that I have learned is that my depression will kick up first thing in the morning. And I have learned not to believe anything I feel for the first two hours of my day. I just don’t believe it. I have the feelings. I have the feelings. The other thing that I have learned to do is I’ve got to move my body.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (08:19)
Mmm, just reject it. Nope.
Ann Ferguson (08:29)
I stick my walking shoes on while I’m sleepy and I walk like three or four miles every morning. And I pray to God while we’re doing it, right? So having that beautiful experience with, I don’t think that was you. I think he gave you something to see and to witness and to say, I’m right here and I’m moving all these little things out of you. I’m cleansing you.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (08:37)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (08:51)
from the junk that happens to be surfacing in your brain and your body today. So beautiful. When we do these neuro graphics, first of all, it’s really important to do it with somebody who is a practitioner because you can draw, but you’re literally messing with the subconscious mind. The neural pathways are really being rewritten. So as you draw,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (08:55)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (09:14)
happens is there’s emotions that surface for a second. All of a sudden you can be angry and then all of sudden you can be disappointed. As you draw, you round the corners of these intersections where these lines are crossing and that calms the nervous system and you have actually just processed something out. It’s just dumped something from your water bottle. It’s like, okay, there it is. It came up and
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (09:35)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (09:39)
Done, have to do several drawings not a magic bullet. However,
instance, did a whole series of drawings around relationships. So what does partnership look like? My parents did not model partnership at all. So it’s really hard to have that neural pathway. The pathway I’ve got might look like something on a TV show. They’re partners. That’s what I see.
And so I’m like anything that is in the way of me showing up as a partner. I want those things cleared out. Then I did another one about communication. So anything that is getting in my way of communicating clearly to my partner, I would love that to be shifted and drawn out. So fast forward about three months later, my husband and I are now talking in ways we have never spoken before.
So whatever triggers were saying, assume that he’s thinking this. I don’t even have to know those are. I just stay calm and present and I can hear differently. It’s absolutely due to those drawings. So I did them like three months ago and it wasn’t until last week living in the thing that I was feeling as I was completing that drawing because that’s what happens. You go through those emotions a little bit.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (10:36)
It just happened naturally.
Ann Ferguson (10:52)
But by the time you’re done and you’ve colored this thing out, you just feel so good about the drawings. I have got a couple of that.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (10:57)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, I did one.
felt like it looked kind of boxy. Like it looked more like like fish scales. And I looking at else’s. I’m like, everybody else’s looks more like neurons.
Ann Ferguson (11:08)
It’s a practice, right? And you get better the more that you draw. And the one we did, I believe, was like you said, that financial one, right? But there are so many more. something called the neuro tree of growth. what do you want to grow and expand? And it’s beautiful because so many times, especially when you’ve got depression,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (11:10)
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (11:28)
you can just hone in and grab on to all the reasons why life sucks. All the back-end story and all the things that people aren’t showing up, you could just knuckle that What we do in this drawing is we go, what are the resources from my past that actually support me? When have I had someone who’s shown up for me or when have I communicated well?
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (11:33)
Mm-hmm, easy. Yeah.
Ann Ferguson (11:53)
or when did I have a water bottle that shook and later on in the day I felt better, cause God’s on my side and I’ve got evidence of that. So we sit in those resources of things from your past and that’s all in that root system. So an acorn, if it’s planted in the ground, it doesn’t run around to get the nutrients. It sits there and the nutrients are drawn to it and as it receives what it needs, it then grows, right?
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (12:19)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (12:20)
So
as we sit and we draw in these where we’ve actually been as you get up into the trunk, that is the present moment. And you go, okay, so I’ve got all of these resources that are helping me grow. And today it looks like this. And then we branch out into the crown of the tree.
That is all the good stuff because all of the growth that happened that day, or that week, or that month, or for your finances, you can grow that, you can grow your health. There are so many different things. It’s one of my favorite drawings is the NeuroTree of growth. So cool.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (12:42)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Ooh, I want to do one. I really
feel like I could definitely use some unblocking of those did the first one and I never went back and did the others because this podcast has consumed so much of my time. It’s like, okay, I got an idea of what this is. Now I want to have her on my show. And so that’s got to wear that went, but I need to go back and do classes within that. And it’s only $25.
Ann Ferguson (13:02)
Yeah, I bet.
Yeah.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (13:12)
So anybody listening to this, if you want to break through financial blocks, absolutely, 100%, please take that class. Where can they find it?
Ann Ferguson (13:20)
They can find it at beliefmatters.com. There’s a tab up top that says Neurographics. Then down at the bottom, says, you want a one-on-one? Do you want date night? Date night is so fun to do. There’s date night and here’s the financial freedom course. It teaches you how to do the lines and then it goes through one of those release drawings.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (13:31)
Yeah?
Yeah, and there’s a free one too.
Ann Ferguson (13:40)
This is the beginnings of a neurotree.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (13:44)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (13:46)
I also have a course called Igniting Your Belief that is a 12-week course that’s led by me or one of the mentors that I’ve trained. One of the things that we teach is that there is an emotional scale that most of us don’t know about.
If we can identify where we are on that scale, then we can know what to do. A level 0 means I’m awesome. I want to be awesome. I want you to be awesome because I’m totally comfortable in my own skin in awesomeness. That’s the goal, by the way. That’s our goal. Yeah, 1000 percent awesome. A level 1 is something’s off.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (14:15)
Yeah. 1000 % awesome.
Ann Ferguson (14:21)
I have no idea. Nobody said anything wrong yet. I’m just off today. Nobody’s done anything. I haven’t done anything wrong. I’m just, off, right? And then a level 2 is actually where we have all been taught to be. We have been taught to push the feeling down because that equals you have adulting control, which isn’t always true, right? So this is when you go, I’m so stressed, but I don’t want to be.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (14:25)
Is someone going to say something wrong?
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (14:51)
or I’m overwhelmed but I can get through. This is the push through the thing and don’t be aware of it.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (14:57)
tell
I can be there quite a bit too. And my son, he’s very empathic. He’s a cancer. I realized when I would try to calm him down, it did not work. It would make things worse. have to be reminded of this when he’s upset, cause sometimes I still go into, let’s make it better. And I’m like, no, that doesn’t work for him. What works for him is if he is upset and screaming and crying or
Ann Ferguson (14:59)
Yeah.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (15:19)
I don’t need to understand why. I just need to emote with If he’s on the floor, ⁓ if I get down on the floor with him and start pounding and saying, this is so hard. ⁓ and I’m not yelling at him. I’m yelling with him. I’m mirroring him. It could gone on for 20 minutes and I’m like, gosh, dang, what did, why is he so, and then I’m like, yeah, get down on the ground with him.
Ann Ferguson (15:35)
Sure, sure, you’re mirroring him, right?
Yeah.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (15:45)
throw a fit alongside of him and then sometimes as little as 20 he’s feeling that validation. She gets me and then he’s good. done.
Ann Ferguson (15:51)
I love it.
me tell you where you’re, yeah, yeah. And let me tell you where you are in the scale, right? So we’ve got zero, I’m gonna be awesome. One, I’m off. Two, I can still shove the sucker down and be an adult, right? Three is when you recognize that you’re feeling, and you can speak it. You’re like, I am stressed. I am overwhelmed. I am sad. I am angry. Like you can actually speak it, right? When you cross into a level four,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (15:55)
But we can do that for ourselves too, so continue, sorry.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm. Mm.
Ann Ferguson (16:20)
That’s where your son was. has so much energy now that it kind of consumes you. So it’s kind of like a teapot you’ve had on and now it’s whistling. Yeah. That’s in your head that just keep running and running and running and running. That’s where that sits, is in a level four. That’s also when can be explosions. That’s when, blah! So you’re either discharging or you’re dissociating.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (16:30)
Yeah, it’s not gonna just stop.
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (16:45)
So this is where quiet comes and it’s not the healthy quiet. It’s the I’m retreating into myself and nobody gets to touch me quiet or the la la la la la of the teenager. Everything’s fine, I’m not going to let you know that I care.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (16:54)
Everything’s fine!
Ann Ferguson (16:59)
A level five is when you do stupid.
level four, you’re texting, you’re writing that email. You just got to get out and let people know. Then level five is when you push;
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (17:04)
Yeah.
Ann Ferguson (17:11)
send that you probably should have never written it on your text thread. You should probably have done it notes or something, right?
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (17:16)
Yeah. Oh, I had a
friend the other day who was at that point and I put my head on her shoulder and I said, just stop writing. not worth it. Just two sentences, it’s all this needs. And she immediately deflated. I okay. Yeah, I get you girl, but yeah. But I can be at the more vocal end of that spectrum. When I explode, it’s not very pretty.
Ann Ferguson (17:30)
Okay. Yeah.
We call that in our house, Psycho Winch, and
believe she lives in every woman.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (17:41)
Psycho Wench, my husband
would agree with you. I’m a very passionate person, so…
Ann Ferguson (17:46)
Yes.
Yeah, and she shows up on a regular basis and we’re fooling ourselves if we think she doesn’t, and we’re not actually wrong, we’re just in an emotional experience. So
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (17:57)
Right.
Ann Ferguson (17:58)
At a level one, two, and three, we still have cognitive function. Because what’s happening by the time you’re level four, biochemically, that’s when there is a flood of chemicals. They’ve been building, but that’s when the flood of chemicals hits and your frontal lobe goes offline. Now you’re just sitting in the limbic system,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (18:14)
Yep, doon!
Ann Ferguson (18:16)
and you’re just reacting, reacting, reacting to everything. So in a one, two or three, there is a way to think yourself out of it and be reasonable and all that. But at a level four or five, the only thing you can do is calm the body It’s both the weapon and the gift,
right? So in the Igniting Belief class, we talk quite a bit about what I call the big bully, And Satan and his minions and all of that kind of stuff.
They don’t get a body. We do. We get to crush their head, but we don’t know how. Part of what igniting your belief does is it actually teaches you the skill set of how. In this particular lesson, it’s what do we do with our body to get us recalibrated so we can get to a three so that we can start to think our way out of this and make some choices. you got to- Pardon me? No. Here’s the thing.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (19:04)
So you actually want to get two or three. You don’t want to stay at a one or a two. Is that what you’re saying?
Ann Ferguson (19:11)
All day long, there’s an emotional scale that you’re coming in and out of depending on the situation. Would you like to just be awesome all the time? Absolutely. Is that possible? No, human. And here’s the problem. None of the other humans around get the memo that you’re at a zero today.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (19:29)
You
Ann Ferguson (19:32)
zero you’re like totally sailing with it and then the other humans they just you know
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (19:34)
Bye.
I had
a session one time with a mentor of she did a session with me I felt on high, like awesome for a week. I mean, it was incredible. I was like, this is my new normal. And at the end of that one or two something hit me off, someone missed the memo that I was at I went back to her and I said, I want to be there all the time. I want to be at that.
Ann Ferguson (19:44)
good.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (19:57)
amazing and she goes honey if you’re there all the time your adrenals would burn out that’s not how it works
Ann Ferguson (20:03)
No,
Absolutely. Here’s the thing. When you start to practice being really aware of each one of these, like where you are in any given moment of the day on this scale, you start to give yourself permission to rock in our human-ness of feeling. It’s totally okay to feel and it’s okay to feel in intensity. What I believe,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (20:20)
Mm-hmm. It’s okay to feel.
Ann Ferguson (20:27)
is that the first emotion that you have actually isn’t the choice. already been programmed somewhere. It’s just been programmed. That’s part of the reason why the neurographics matter, because we can deprogram, right? But the very first initial emotion that you have is not the choice. That’s just there. And once we recognize it, we honor it, we go, rocking my humanist. This is what I feel. Then we can make a choice.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (20:33)
I believe that. Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
It’s just there.
So the worst thing we can do in that situation is to shame and guilt ourselves for having that initial feeling or emotion.
Ann Ferguson (20:59)
Absolutely.
Absolutely. So I had a situation. about 20 years ago, I still subscribe to the belief that there are certain things not supposed to feel. like greed and jealousy and hatred and all of those things are just those are the taboos you don’t feel. You’re not a good girl if you feel those things. I had jealousy and I had a lot of jealousy.
I kept going, no, I need to be grateful for what I have. I could talk myself out of it. But that jealousy was sitting right under the surface. And I kept making me so wrong for that. Here’s the truth. That jealousy was my best friend because somebody was trying to take my husband from me. There was an affair. And that jealousy was saying, hey, babe, something’s not OK right now. And you need to pay attention to me. I’m your friend. I didn’t know how to honor what I experienced as a human;
awareness so that I can make a choice. That’s all the emotions are. I have figured out, I know this is really, really simplified, that it makes sense to me why we don’t know how to feel. And it’s, yes, our parents told us not to, but there’s more. I read a biography of someone who had been in World War II, who was about 20 when the war broke
say, yeah, we were so excited. We were going to fight the big war and we were going to be war heroes and protect our families and all of this. And I went, oh my gosh. They were actually totally innocent. have media. They had never seen a body blown up.
We have a desensitization
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (22:31)
Yeah
Ann Ferguson (22:33)
in our society now. Back then, there was no desensitization. Now they go over and to protect their families and the very real evil that existed, they had to do things that were morally against everything that they had ever been taught. All the neural pathways were just jacked up. Then to get home, you obey your commanding officer without questions Now neural pathways have been written.
So what we know about war and those kinds of things now is we had a whole generation of PTSD. even the women who didn’t know if the knock on the door was gonna be your husband’s gone or what happens with me, my husband travels a lot. And what happens with me is by two to three weeks,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (23:05)
Yeah.
Ann Ferguson (23:17)
I have got my masculine on and I’m doing the things that I need to do and there’s nobody around for me to melt into the softness again. Right? And so that shoves all of that down. I can’t, I can’t be there. I’ve got to be strong for the family. All of that kind of stuff kicks in. Those are my grandparents who taught my parents. Suck it up little camper. rubbed dirt in it, but like a trench. Obey me without
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (23:25)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, yeah.
Ann Ferguson (23:45)
questioning me because I know better. And this other phrase, I’m preparing you for the world. Why? Because they weren’t prepared for the world. That’s where that came from. They weren’t prepared. And it was a shock. And they never spoke about what they experienced over there. Yeah, thank you.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (23:54)
⁓ Yeah, like they, it was a shock. Like what?
Why? That’s so common. My grandpa was the same. We saw him
in a documentary after he died and went, what? He was there?
Ann Ferguson (24:10)
Right? They taught my parents who taught me and prepared me for the world. my world was my school family, my extended family, church family, the neighborhood that was the world. Anything outside of that was in the encyclopedia. That’s where I understood that there were people in Africa. the encyclopedia told me at the library. Right? And so they were the authority.
Then something happened, the internet. I was a young mom. had three kids, five and below, when we had our first little bing, bing AOL. And everything changed. On the internet, because we’re behind things and people can’t see us, we feel
and it was being accepted and it was being talked about. was expansion that happened and I wasn’t prepared for that world. Now, these kids that are 30-somethings, their parents are Gen Xers, that we knew how to just shove everything down and we were honored and respected for having no needs and being on our own.
and not having any feelings and being able to keep things contained. And if you don’t go to your room, right? And if you don’t stop screaming, you’re not going to get dessert, right? All of those things are playing in. And so my parents never taught me emotional language. This is why it matters. When we’re an infant, we cry, caregiver comes and does one of two things, figures out the physical needs or the nervous system.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (25:21)
Mm. Yeah.
Ann Ferguson (25:45)
calming, holding. When we’re two, we figure out that people are saying something and they’re getting what they want. So we’re trying and we don’t have language yet. And the minute we can say, I need a drink of water, they calm down. There’s not the tantrums because mom has been there going, okay, just say, can I have a drink of water, please? Okay, good, here you go. So we gave language.
But because we were never taught emotional vocabulary, we couldn’t give it to our kids. And we’re up. There was a study done by Brene Brown where she asked 7,000 people:
What emotions can you name in the moment that you’re experiencing it? Which ones? Out of 7,000 people, the average was three emotions per person. Happy, sad, angry. We can say stress. Now we can say anxious, overwhelmed, right? But the average was three.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (26:42)
Yeah.
Wouldn’t you say those are all secondary emotions? Like there’s emotions that come first and then you feel sad, happy or angry. Yeah.
Ann Ferguson (26:48)
Absolutely. But those are the ones that we know.
Anything outside of us, seem to know what everybody else is feeling, but not us. That again is because of media. Because on the TV, a woman will walk into a kitchen and there’s this musical soundtrack and you know she better watch out because somebody’s behind that wall. Or she walks into the same kitchen and there’s a musical soundtrack. You go, my gosh, she’s got flowers.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (26:57)
Mm. Mm-hmm.
Hmm.
Ann Ferguson (27:14)
There’s like the music tells us what to feel as we’re witnessing other people. If people are saying, well, they’re feeling this and they’re feeling that and they’re feeling this, but they can’t identify in themselves, that’s part of why. been trained to identify everybody else’s emotion and assumptions are all over the place. is so much. a little game that I play.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (27:19)
Hmm.
gets us in trouble a lot, those assumptions.
Ann Ferguson (27:40)
to teach emotional vocabulary. And it’s so much fun. It’s only five minutes a And the game is, when is the last time you felt
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (27:49)
Mmm.
Ann Ferguson (27:50)
We actually go into memory. We’re in the moment of it, and we’re only going to touch it. We’re not going to sit and delve So when is the last time, let’s do this with you, when is the last time you felt competent? Yeah.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (28:01)
competent.
Probably two days ago I was driving my husband to Mineral Springs because he couldn’t. I like, I can do this.
Ann Ferguson (28:12)
There you
go. Okay, so what you did, I love how you went ⁓ and you paused because you were actually accessing a memory, right? Okay, if you sit in that memory long enough, you may have even started, but if you sit in the memory and just kind of put yourself back there, your body will feel the exact same sensations that you felt when you had competence. And now you can say, ⁓ that feeling in my body equals I’m competent, That’s so fun. So,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (28:18)
Yeah, was like, tic-tic-tic-tic-tic. Yeah.
Ann Ferguson (28:40)
When is a time that you felt, let’s go disappointed. When’s the time you felt disappointed?
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (28:51)
Recently
when my son got blood work back that needs to be looked at again.
Ann Ferguson (28:56)
yeah. yeah. That’s big,
Thank you for going there and just opening that up. That’s healthy vulnerability right there. But if you sit in that, disappointment. When we actually have conversations with people and something happens, can say, hold up. Okay, so I’m feeling this. My husband came to me one day and he says,
I need to tell you something and I don’t want to because I don’t know how you’re going to feel about it.” I said, okay, Fun fact, you can’t make me feel anything. Other fun fact, I get to feel whatever I want to, so you might as well go. He told me and he was right, it was a big deal. He goes, so I don’t know how you feel. I dropped in and I went.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (29:23)
Mmm.
We’ve had those conversations too.
Ann Ferguson (29:39)
What is my body doing? I feel betrayed. I feel jealous. I feel left out.
Yeah, that’s what I feel. But see, I didn’t give the emotion to him that you made me feel, so now you’re supposed to calm my nervous system down. Because I have the skill set to go, hey, I’m at a one, two, or three. Right then, I was still at a three, and I could cognitively work my way out of it, and I wasn’t spinning at the knowing that actually has helped after effects when you can actually name an
I did not do this with my children when my granddaughter was over to the house. So we had done pizza bagels. We were having so much fun. This is frozen like berry thing that she likes. So let’s go get dessert. We go to the fridge and I had forgotten to separate them out into individual things. It was still sitting in the glass dish all frozen. We couldn’t get to it right? Oh no, oh no, we can’t. We can’t do it right now, but we’ll do it in a minute. Immediately she six. Reactionary.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (30:16)
Mm-hmm.
no.
Mmhmm.
Ann Ferguson (30:38)
she starts
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (30:38)
Right.
Ann Ferguson (30:38)
to want to fit, right? No, but I want my dessert, I want my dessert. And I’m like, no, no, no, no, you don’t understand, I can’t get it, but I want my dessert. Okay, neuro pathway. Immediately, she looks like my daughter, first of all, and what I hear is stop it, you need to stop it. I didn’t say it, I heard it. And I went, stop it, stop it. Olivia,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (30:56)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (31:02)
look really upset right now. Are you upset? She goes, yes, you tricked me. And I go, Wow. I said, I tricked you because I said let’s cook a dessert. No, you can’t have it? She goes, yes. And that is mean. And I said, you know what? You’re not wrong, honey. That is really mean if that’s what’s I did. So I got a spoon and we kind of dug into it and she couldn’t have it. And when she realized she really couldn’t have it, then she got even more emotional about it.
my past with her mom, I would have said, to your room right now. In other words, you’re having an emotion, go take care of it, and as soon as you are done and you don’t have any expression of it, you can come down again. Instead,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (31:41)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (31:43)
trying to sit there and she’s really going and I go, oh, do you know what you’re feeling right now? And she goes, what? And I said, well, when you want something really bad and you cannot have it, that’s called impatience. So can you say impatient? She goes, impatient. And I go, do you like it? She goes, no. And I go, I don’t either. She goes, what? I oh, I hate it. When I want something really bad and I can’t have it, I do not like that feeling. I said, but I have a trick.
And she goes, what? And I go, I make my brain busy for a little bit. And then bam, time’s up. I can have what I want. She goes, really? I go, yeah, do you have anything we can make your brain busy with? She goes, my iPad? I go, let’s do it. Totally different scenario.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (32:23)
Ha ha ha!
Ann Ferguson (32:27)
than her mom because her mom would have been upstairs letting me know that she needed help and support emotionally. She would have kicked the door. She would have yelled louder. She would have been calling to me because all of this nervous system stuff was too big nobody was there to process with her, right?
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (32:36)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
And that may have been literally, because I do have days where I don’t have the mental capacity to go through that process you just described, and I’m going to hurt someone if I don’t separate myself. So I will insist you got to go in the room or I got to go in the room, but there’s got to be a wall between us for the next 10 minutes. ⁓
Ann Ferguson (32:49)
No, absolutely.
Time out.
Right.
No, absolutely appropriate because when you’re at a four, moving into a five, five is stupid. You don’t want to do stupid to humans, right? So that’s what that is. It’s like I’m calling the timeout, which is appropriate.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (33:09)
Yeah. Right.
But the neuropathway
stuff can help you get to a point where most of the time you don’t get to a four or a five. You can stay in that zone and it’s not hard. It’s just part of what you become.
Ann Ferguson (33:25)
No.
What you do you healthily dissociate. That’s when you become the observer and you go, what is this feeling? I’m feeling really impatient. I’ll tell you what the feeling was that I was struggling with. It was shame. I was a bad grandma. I had planned it out. She was going to celebrate my name and didn’t work. So now I got failure and shame.
crawling up my body. And because I knew what shame feels like I actually caught it, and yes, those neural pathways, it got rewritten. It got rewritten. It’s something that we never learned. And I know for a fact that that is part of the thing that contributed to my depression. If nobody is there for you when you are sad,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (34:06)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (34:10)
or when you’re struggling and you’re it buries.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (34:13)
I was a tall order. was pretty much a mess most of the time as a child. I was just, hard and even if my mom had had all of the tools, I think it would have been pretty hard for her to be there in that way waking moment that I was awake. And I’m sure there’s things that could have been done
Ann Ferguson (34:18)
Mm.
Yeah.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (34:31)
to me as a child differently that would have gotten me out of that space so that I wasn’t doing that every day. But she didn’t know what those were. And she was just doing the best she could. So did a lot of, I don’t know what to do with to your room, stop it. You’re wrong.
Ann Ferguson (34:37)
Well, she didn’t know how, right? didn’t know how.
You’re too much.
That’s the neural pathway that got written. I’m too much. I’m too intense.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (34:46)
Yeah. Yeah. Which is a part
of my personality that’s actually pretty awesome when it’s channeled right way.
Ann Ferguson (34:54)
Right, right. You’re not wrong or bad. They didn’t know what to do with us. And it’s because nobody did anything for them. Right? I have a whole family of people who are depressed. it’s a real thing when you are not heard, seen, or understood. Those are the things.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (35:02)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (35:14)
that say, don’t matter in this world. So one of the things about that little feelings jar exercise is that when you do this with your kids and you take out a feeling and you say, when’s the last time you felt rejected? And you’re there to actually listen to the experience that they didn’t tell you. There’s only one response. You don’t fix it. All you do is say, thank you so much for letting me in. I don’t know what to say about this right now, but I’m just really glad you let me in.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (35:30)
Mm.
Ann Ferguson (35:43)
The reason why kids don’t talk to parents is because I’m gonna make them mad, I’m gonna disappoint them, I’m gonna make them sad, and I don’t wanna do that, right? And so I’m not gonna say anything, because I don’t wanna make them feel this thing. If there’s enough practice with this, then the kid knows, my mom knows how to listen to me when I feel rejected. So when there’s a great big thing that they need to talk to you with, you’ve already established
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (35:49)
I’m a fixer. Yeah.
Ann Ferguson (36:09)
that you’re there, you know how to do this, you know how to handle it so that they can express, so that then you guys can make decisions about things or help them out of it. You’re seen, heard, and understood. And so because of that, they go to you instead of other people, number one. And the other thing is they matter on this earth. So this was such a big tool that a mentee who was in the Nevada National Guard.
She took it to her commanding officer and it was ordered that everybody on base had to do the failings jar. My friend, she thought it was going to be a five-minute thing, but then the guys actually started talking and wanted to tell her about things and it was like, my gosh. I’ve also gone into businesses. I worked with a tire company to help readjust their whole culture because leadership wasn’t.
communicating with the shop guys and the shop guys were mad at the leadership was all bad. Anyway, I believe that over there they still have a word of the day and it completely changed the way that they showed up for each other. Just that gaining emotional vocabulary and feeling that somebody is safe to speak it. makes you believe that you matter and the other people are safe. That’s huge belief.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (37:20)
Yeah, without that judgment.
Ann Ferguson (37:22)
all of this to say, a couple of things. Number one, the neurographics, what it does is it can layer that is just absolutely stuck in concrete. Like what is it that’s not even letting you hear this or try or trust or anything? What is that? And you don’t even know why, right? But if you have a belief that you are too much and you’re too intense and
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (37:40)
You don’t even know why.
Ann Ferguson (37:47)
I can’t deal with you, then that’s going to run through most of what you do. We’ve got to uncover whatever that is and we don’t have to talk about it. That’s the best thing about neurographics. We don’t have to go into the memory. We don’t have to dig to find what that belief is. We just go, I’m going to set the intention. Anything that has to do with my financial life. want the things removed and released.
that are stopping me from that. So what I’ve learned is that most of our limiting beliefs that we have, they are not stored via language. They’re stored via emotion. So for in my case, I this belief that you don’t ask people for money. I didn’t know where that came from. Not great as a business owner.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (38:28)
frequency.
Ann Ferguson (38:38)
to have that one stuck in you, right? I found out later that my dad had asked his stepfather for a loan. My dad was working two jobs and something big came up and they needed something; he asked for a loan. step grandfather was old time cattle rancher and you deal in cash, amen. So he didn’t give my dad a loan. And my parents never talked about money in front of me, but there was definitely…
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (38:40)
Mm-hmm.
Hmm. Yeah.
Ann Ferguson (39:05)
some kind of vibrational frequency that says you don’t ask for money that I got and I absorbed and I totally believe that that was true. It was morally wrong if I don’t make it on my own and all of that, I was weak. That’s the kind of thing that you can’t get to with talking because you don’t even know what emotional resonance is there.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (39:10)
Mm-hmm.
or weak. Yeah.
Yeah, you know now, but
maybe at the time you did the Neural like, I don’t know where this came from. I don’t know what it is.
Ann Ferguson (39:31)
I don’t know what it is. don’t know what it
is. Yeah. As you draw, there’s the regular black and white stuff that is mirroring the neurons in your brain and changing stuff. But when you start to add color, there are archetypes in color. Green, we say that’s growth or that’s money and yellow is light and blue is fluid water or whatever we associate. But as we’re choosing those colors and we’re drawing,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (39:58)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (40:01)
We’re actually going deeper and deeper down into the subconscious place where emotion exists we resolve. And every stroke of visual pleasure, honestly, as you’re drawing, it changes become OK with whatever that emotion was. And you come out of this drawing and this feeling of, it looks like fish scales, but I kind of like it.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (40:23)
Well, and I I ask my listeners, just think, how long has it been since you’ve drawn? I think as adults, we forget to a child, I drew all the time, probably every day several times a day. there must be some kind of connection of tapping into that inner child when we’re doing that as well.
Ann Ferguson (40:32)
Right?
I absolutely believe that is true. And the things that the mind is going through while we’re doing some people can we paint? No, because the hatching motion back and forth, back and forth, back and forth while we’re coloring is actually activating things in the frontal lobe of the brain. it’s helping with that rewriting thing. So there’s activity that’s going on in your brain as you’re looking at things, as you’re creating, as feelings come up, as you add color, it’s profound.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (40:48)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (41:04)
It’s absolutely profound. have not tapped into all of it yet. So like I said, it only came into the United January, 2024. I picked it up in February of 2024. yeah, yeah. And the company this forward, I’m now working for and of these videos and things for them in English because have Russian speakers.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (41:15)
That’s cool.
Yeah. ⁓
Ann Ferguson (41:28)
I think they need somebody
that has English. I’ve done some really intense certification study and I’ve barely tapped the surface of what this can do. We take the lid off, but there are patterns of behavior that may still cause us issue. Because we don’t know how do these things like, how do you forgive? We’re supposed to forgive, nobody teaches us how.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (41:52)
Hmm.
Ann Ferguson (41:52)
We’re supposed
to use the atonement. Nobody actually teaches you how to do that.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (41:56)
⁓
that one, that was a hard one for me. And I get it. enough to actually access it. Whereas for a long time, my dad was a seminary teacher and he would throw out the words, just use the atonement, Jennifer. And he is so sweet. that’s all, it’ll be so easy. And I’m like, I love you, but I don’t get it. This makes no sense.
Ann Ferguson (42:09)
There’s no how. There’s no how. Yeah.
Well, and part of that is because the neural pathway, it’s an interesting pathway, is that however you related to your dad, we project onto God because He calls himself Father.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (42:25)
My dad was a good dad. I have no complaints.
Ann Ferguson (42:26)
Yeah, and then some good God is
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (42:28)
But he couldn’t solve my problems. He couldn’t heal my depression. Maybe that was… that was the thing. He could empathize with me, but he was like, mm, you know, I love you, but I can’t fix it.
Ann Ferguson (42:31)
Ooh, mm-hmm. Yeah.
So you had
to kind of go, oh, God is not my father. He can heal my things, right? There’s this shift into what celestial parenting might look a meditation that they have that leads people into just handing over and releasing the things that don’t serve them anymore. We’ve got a lot of fear about that release.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (42:45)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (43:02)
In the neurographics, we don’t have to do it.
So there’s a man who brings his child to be healed and asks the Savior And the Savior says, do you believe? And the man says, help thou my unbelief. It wasn’t that he didn’t have faith.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (43:10)
Mm-hmm.
Okay, that one. Okay, got it.
Ann Ferguson (43:18)
because he brought him to the Savior. It’s will he form me? And then if he does, I’m gonna have a complete identity crisis. Like who am I?
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (43:22)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, I was afraid of what I would be
of that, who am I If it was all pulled away, am I really lame? I find out who I really am, is it going to be a disappointment? I think I was really scared of that.
Ann Ferguson (43:31)
Who am I?
Yeah, having your identity shifted. Now you know your superpowers and your strength, and you know, and you go, God gave me all of this because he wants me to use it in really cool, powerful ways, and I’m accepting of that, and knowing how to navigate it. I think once we find our superpower, we all need to go to the X-Men university camp, whatever. They learn how to hone it.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (43:39)
And I’m not scared anymore, but that was a thing.
A few of them.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Ann Ferguson (44:03)
they get a handle on their stuff, I think of it. So the neuro graphics opens the door and starts the process of being okay with the superpowers and who you are for real. And then there needs to be some training on how do I do this? How do I find joy when everything is crazy and stupid and broken around
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (44:25)
Or how
do I change this gift that I’ve used the opposite way? used this gift to hurt people, but it could be used to heal people, you And forgive myself for using this gift in the wrong way and letting that go and not being afraid to use it.
Ann Ferguson (44:29)
Yes, yes. How do I do that? Because there’s a.
And so how do you forgive? Like, what is the process? There’s a book called Forgive for Good by Dr. Fred Luskin. He’s like the forgiveness researcher, like Brene Brown is the shame researcher. And he found out that there were steps and processes that people go through when they actually forgive. And so there’s this pattern and you can kind of see where you are in that pattern. It’s beautiful, absolutely beautiful. So again, we supposed to let it go.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (44:47)
Ooh.
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (45:08)
Well, what does that even mean? To let it go? Yeah.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (45:10)
Yeah. And energetically too, there’s some people,
if you look at astrology what’s going on with their human design, a quality that some people have where it’s very, very, very hard energetically for them to release things naturally. Like they really have to tap into divine power of God and be able to do it. it gets easily stuck and they tend to carry everybody’s stuff and then resent.
Ann Ferguson (45:25)
Yeah.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (45:34)
people for carrying all of the stuff that they’re carrying. yeah, like, So that’s a I think any of these problems that can also be gifts, it really does take that surrender and I can’t do it. And realizing you can’t do it, stop trying. Stop trying to do it literally requires a plug-in from a divine source to get…
Ann Ferguson (45:37)
Well, people are dangerous then. Like who wants to be nailed at because they’re going to just absorb it all, right? Yeah.
It does.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (46:00)
it to work and if you’re not willing to do it, it’s gonna stay stuck. Whatever that is.
Ann Ferguson (46:05)
Whatever that is, whatever that is, there is a neural pathway that we have about the atonement. We have a belief that we caused his pain. So as we approach, we approach with shame. I didn’t mean to, I’m so sorry. I’m the bad one. Well, yeah, because you’re the and it’s not, and it’s not. Here’s some really fun stuff. In the Bible dictionary, it says that repentance,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (46:16)
Mmm.
Ann Ferguson (46:32)
is a change of mind, a fresh view on God, yourself, and others. The heart comes later. Why? Because you have a thought, and the thought generates the emotion, which generates the behavior, So the fruit of sin is what the results were from your misperception. Because the root of all sin is just you don’t understand something. It’s all misperception. All of us are sinners because
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (46:33)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (46:58)
It turns out none of us understand heaven, right? It doesn’t mean we are worthless and we need to grovel at the foot of the cross. is not the case. But we have this neural pathway that says, I need to feel really, really bad because I know I’m a sinner. that’s not true. It’s I need to know what do want me to know, Lord? That changes our And so…
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (47:20)
And the Lord
does not get angry at us, I don’t think so much as he gets angry at the sin. different. If you can view it that way, here’s the sin that I indulged in, I didn’t understand, I did the best I could given the understanding I had at the time. And God doesn’t hate me, he’s not resentful of me, he loves me unconditionally, he’s mad at the darkness, he doesn’t like the darkness that hurt me, right?
Ann Ferguson (47:24)
No!
So I want
to just go into that darkness for a minute because the law of opposition exists, there is only one enemy because there’s only one God. You’re not your own worst enemy. And those minions, if the spirit is giving you all this enlightenment and help in shaking a bottle and telling you you’re going to be okay, then the law of opposition says that all of those minions can tell you all of the other stuff, right?
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (47:52)
Mm-hmm.
Thank you.
Ann Ferguson (48:10)
And when you say he hates the darkness, that’s what he hates. The ones who are messing with us, who are jacking up our perceptions of who we are and leading us into stuff that is just gonna sink our souls. That’s the darkness. The thing he hates is that, not the human. The behavior is like, ⁓ shoot, this is really rough. mean, if you ever watch
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (48:32)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, compassion.
so sorry you’re hurting yourself. This hurts me too, but we do. We hurt for our kids when we see them making poor choices. Like, please don’t.
Ann Ferguson (48:39)
I’m so sorry.
right? but we don’t hate the kid. So here’s a different thought on I was reading scripture and I saw this place where Jesus was weeping and it was joyful. And I’m like, why, why, tell me more? That’s one of my favorite things is like, tell me more. When I capture an idea. heard, I guess, a thought came through.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (48:46)
Yeah. No!
Ann Ferguson (49:08)
that after the trial of his faith, he was finally rewarded. And I said, the trial of his faith, I don’t understand that. And then it came, he could have healed every leper in Jerusalem. He could have called down angels and let people hear him talk to His father. Like He could have done all of that for everyone and he had to restrain his power.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (49:16)
Christ’s Faith.
Ann Ferguson (49:36)
to honor freedom of choice. If somebody chose to believe him or explore, their faith made them whole. but everybody else, no. So now comes to the Americas now every single person comes to him. Every single one came to him and that was the reward. He finally in physical form got to be
their Christ. Can you imagine? All of them. And it blessed him so much that he just wept because he finally didn’t have to restrain that power And so the neural pathway that I had to change about Christ and me and sin and repentance is it gives him joy to be my Christ. Right? To just know that he’s just going,
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (50:02)
He could heal all of them.
Ann Ferguson (50:27)
that’s why I came, not that’s why I came, should have done this, 2000 years, I did it for you. What’s your problem? I don’t ever see that. Like even when I’m working one-on-one with somebody and helping them shift these pathways, I only experience his energy, him in the moment of healing as gratitude. Just grateful that we are coming, that we are allowing him.
to do what he came here to do. When that neural pathway was rewritten, so much changed for me about the atonement and about how I have this big brother who just freaking loves me. And there’s a…
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (51:05)
He just wants you
the gift. And run with it.
Ann Ferguson (51:07)
He just, just does.
And if I can really sit with big brotherness, right, there’s this him hugging this woman in a wheat field. And that hug is like, hey, sis, I love it because I want the hey, sis moment with my savior. Like I see you, you did a good job. Or hey, sis, that was really rough. Let’s go walk, let’s go talk, hun. That is the one who’s saying, I want you to come to me.
Jennifer Stirling-Campbell (51:23)
Mm-hmm.
Ann Ferguson (51:35)
And the reward that he gets, the glory that he gets is being able to execute his power that he gained from that moment of the atonement. has no place in it. And that doesn’t mean we don’t have regret. And we’d all go, wow, I really wish I had handled this differently. Tell me what I need to know so that I will not behave that way. I need the new thought about this situation, about this person or whatever. It didn’t go well.
do I not know about me, about them, about you? What do I not know? That’s repentance.
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